Worst. Airline. Ever.

Gotta be Delta.

So I've got a 3:50 out of San Antonio. I get to the airport gate and they are delayed until 4:27. So I go to the gate agent and say, you know, it doesn't look like I'll make the connecting flight in Atlanta, so why don't you just go ahead and switch my reservation to a later flight to Raleigh. No, no, no, no, you'll make it, no problem. I get on the plane, and, of course, we circle Atlanta in the air for awhile and I deplane at 8:20 to try to catch my 8:30 connection in another terminal. Needless to say, I don't make it.

Delta has a a station set up to assist passengers--I should suspect something is up when every other gate has a red "Missed Your Flight?" sign with a "Swipe and Go" machine. The cusmoter service there says, well, the later flight to Raleigh, you know the one you asked us to put you on in San Antonio? Well that's sold out. Good news, though, there's a plane tomorrow morning.

I feel like saying "I told you so" but I've had a long day and I've been sick on the plane, etc. so I say "fine, just give me my hotel voucher and I'll take the morning flight." Well, sir, the hotel will be at a REDUCED rate for you...

Ummm....reduced?

Yeah, only $59.

Delta is not going to give me a voucher for causing me to miss my connecting fault? No, we don't do that unless it is our fault that you missed the connection. Ummmm....but it is your fault. No, it's air traffic control's fault because the weather shut down the airport earlier....that's why your flight in San Antonio was delayed. But that's also when I told you to put me on the later connection and you declined to so because you, Delta, said the plane would still arrive in time to make the connection.

Guess I won't be flying Delta again any time soon.

Courtyard by Marriott Scam

Hey Courtyard by Marriott welcome to the customer service hall of shame.

Wife and I prebooked a room via Priceline to stay at a Courtyard by Marriott for two days. When we checked in, even though the room was prepaid, they asked for a credit card for "incidentals." No problem, usually, since I just don't use the incidentals at a hotel.

When I checked out, they tried to charge me a $1.08/per night for a "Room Safe Warranty." I mentioned that I had paid in advance and that per the agreement with Priceline, they had agreed to give me a room for the price quoted.

I got a canned response that this was a "standard" policy and that this charge was not covered in the price of the room because it was an incidental.

Huh? Since when? Incidentals are things you request over and above the cost of the room or which you can opt out of by not using. A safe is in the room, whether you use it or not and they know it will be part of the room when they get the offer for the price. This is not like a movie or Internet service where the person can agree on the additional charge when they use the service--this was added just for it being there to use if I wanted it.

I swear, all I could think about was that song in Les Miserables:

"Charge em for the lice..

Extra for the mice...

Two percent for looking in the mirror twice!

Here a little slice,

There a little cut...

Three percent for sleeping with the window shut!"

Courtyard by Marriott, when the first thing that comes to someone's mind when they hear your name is the Thernardiers, you have a corporate image problem.

CC to Priceline, too...if the customer can't be assured that the price the hotel "agrees" upon when you book through Priceline is the actual price he will have to pay, then what is the point of using your service? So, if I were Priceline, I would tell Courtyard that they need to cease this practice or I won't send them customers. Their dishonesty hurts the faith customers have in YOUR service.

GoDaddy Rocks

Okay, so I'm probably going to get howls of derision from people who are really tech savvy, but since I've often posted about customer service nightmares I've had (I'm looking at you Blockbuster), it's only fair that I mention some positive experiences.

For the last year and a half, I've had my personal film blog, http://1morefilmblog.com hosted on GoDaddy. Today I had a technical issue that was giving an error message instead of my site.

I called the 24/7 help line at 11:30 at night, spoke to an ACTUAL PERSON (within a 10 minute wait time) who resolved my issue.

Having the tech support allows me to focus on the content of my site, which is what web hosting should be all about. For a very reasonable price, GoDaddy allows me to create a site that I think looks great and is kept up to date.

Plus, the service person I spoke to was very knowledgeable. He neither spoke to me like I was an idiot nor tried to shove more products down my throat. It's so weird to get good customer service these days that when you do it almost feels like, "That didn't just happen, did it?"

Thanks GoDaddy.

Borders, Welcome to the Customer Service Hall of Shame

On occasion I use this blog to point out the shockingly bad customer service of various companies I've had the displeasure to do business with.

Today's entry has to do with Borders.

It always surprises me, although it probably shouldn't, how so many of the companies that make this list are second or third banana to some major competitor. One would expect, as the slogan goes, for number two (or three) to "try harder," to attempt to make up in service for what they cannot match in price, location, or convenience. Alas, no.

Through taking some online polls, I got a reward of $15 in "Borders Bucks" added to my Borders Rewards card. I waited until I received my e-mail confirmation and headed to the store--about a twenty minute drive.

After perusing the shelves, I took my items to the cashier, who swiped my rewards card and told me that I did not have any Borders Bucks on it. I told her about the reward, and she said that this had been a problem--if I had a print out of the e-mail she could "give it to me." (Hmmm, "give it" like a gift, see.) Of course there was no printer or e-mail access there, so I went home and printed the e-mail.

The next day, my friend and I were going to the movie, so we stopped at Borders to pick up a book for my wife. I got it, took it to the cashier, who again told me that despite my e-mail confirmation, my card had no buck on it. I explained that I had been in there yesterday, had been told to bring a copy of the e-mail, and presented it. She then informed me that the e-mail was not acceptable because too many people printed them off and tried to use them to double dip. Why had I been told to bring it, then? (Perhaps to get me back in the store in hopes that, when I had book at cashier I'd just say, "Oh well," and pay cash?)

She said I had to call Borders "customer service" number. I used my cell phone, and well, you know that score. Some call center in India with a voice activated menu that told me call volumes were high, my call was important, but it could be a thirty minute wait to talk to a representative. Couldn't miss the movie, so for the second day in a row, I left without my item. (My wife wanted the book, so I actually went down the street to Barnes & Noble to buy it.)

Anyhow, I finally called the customer service center and spoke to someone. They took my card number and said, yes, my account had $15 on it. Why wasn't it showing up at the store? Well, I had put the money in around the 20th of the month. Borders Bucks expire at the end of each month. (That this is so is, in and of itself, a horrible customer service thing, but let that pass...). Since many people did not know they expire, Borders decided to wait until the first of the next calendar month for my reward to be available. That way, the representative explained, I had a whole 30 days to spend my bucks before they expired unbeknownst to me and there would be fewer people who showed up at the store only to find out that their bucks had expired. Wasn't that nice of them?

Well, no.

For one, I can't imagine the majority of the people don't go to the store (or the web site) soon after they get their bucks. For another, this wouldn't be an issue except for the stuff expiring to begin with. But the real issue is, why not just TELL the customer when the reward is issued? My e-mail specifically said the reward could be redeemed for 30 days after the date of issuance. Silly me, I thought that meant the next 30 days, not some random 30 days after the issuance. Gee, what we meant is that we pick 30 random days without telling you in the year 2015 and they'll be good then. Those are, after all, 30 different days AFTER the date of issuance.

Again, could it be that their hope is to get people in the store who will then buy something because they are there and come back later to use the bucks? I sure think so. Sad thing is, they achieved the exact opposite--due to lousy customer service, my resolve is to never shop at Borders again unless I have to. It's not worth the headache, and why reward a company for treating its customers so shabbily?

What do Facets and L.L. Bean Have in Common?

I love Facets. Having lived in Northern Illinois for 10 years, I can't imagine what would induce anyone to want to live in Chicago, except maybe Facets.

So I was thrilled that they started offering a Netflix like rental membership via mail. The market advantage? Facets has hundreds of rare, OOP VHS films that members can rent via mail with a membership.

Now the catch is that you do have to pay the shipping on VHS rentals (not on DVDs) and there is a $200 claim against a lost or damaged OOP VHS film, so treat those rentals like the valuable commodity they are.

If I were President Obama, here would be my stimulus plan. Give everyone a free Facets membership. They'll end up spending money on shipping because its so darn tantalizing to finally be able to see Red Desert, or Greed, or The Bitter Tea of General Yen, or This Happy Breed. Yesterday in the mail I got Joseph Losey's The Go-Between.

Aside from just making you all mad with envy and my cinephelic bliss, I post this for another reason. Facets is having some growing pains going from essentially a store to a by mail rental service. Those of you who have read this blog before know I love to rag on companies with poor customer service (I'm looking at you Blockbuster) or deceptive practices (I'm looking at you Time Warner Cable). So it was stunning and refreshing to send an e-mail complaint about problems I was having with my Facets membership and get...gasp...a response. Not only was my problem corrected, but I was given a small bonus for having to put up with them getting the kinks out.

This would be as good a time as any to review some principles for approaching customer service issues to maximize your possible results:

1) Keep a record of who you contacted and when. Letters and calls that say, "I've called three times and and spoken to x, y, and z" tend to get more attention than "I've been getting the run around!"

2) Know who you are speaking to and what they are authorized to do. There is no sense arguing with someone who is only paid to record information. Ask to speak to a supervisor if you are not satisfied with the response. All they can do is say "no."

3) Know what you want. This would seem self evident but it isn't. By the time most people get around to calling customer service, there is a problem and they just want to vent or complain. Before you dial (or boot up e-mail), ask yourself what you want out of the exchange? A refund? A credit? An upgrade? A change of practice? An apology? Too often we approach a business with a complaint and expect them to guess what we want or just start lobbing things in our direction. Chances are, though, they are going to peg you pretty early in an exchange as a potential customer who can be kept or a complainer who wants to vent. The company's purpose in dealing with the former is to win you back. With the latter it is to finish the transaction as quickly as possible and move on.

4) Compensation is better than vengeance. It may be emotionally satisfying to say "I want whoever helped me fired..." but, hey, that's probably not going to happen. There is time and money invested in advertising, hiring, and training, even for call centers, temps, or customer service. Good managers really take a cost assessment approach to customer service, and part of that is making concrete what something is going to cost (in terms of money or time) to fix. Uncertain costs scare us as consumers, but they scare managers as well. If a delivery person shows up late, you are much more likely to get a manager to waive the delivery fee than to fire the delivery person or agree to pay lost wages or your baby sitter. The former is a fixed cost, the latter tend to be expenses that they may not know what they are agreeing to.

5) If someone gives you good customer service, go back there. I recently returned a backpack with a lifetime guarantee to LL Bean. They replaced it at no charge. Some stuff at Bean costs a little more, but I go back because I want to reward companies that give good service not just punish those that don't.